Artillery of Words: Cleos, Cougars and Weeds
You’ve certainly heard of “it” girls but what about “it” words to describe girls?
COUGAR. 21ST CENTURY SLANG.
Now, there’s a word that’s been inundating the media lately. We all have our rough ideas about this word’s meaning as it applies to women. Older woman on the prowl for a younger man. Some see it as a symbol of female empowerment, but others, like Donna Estes Antebi, view the use of the word as a pejorative term.
Defintion:
The label Cougar conjures images not of women of merit and achievement, but of fountain-of-youth seeking desperation. “Cougars” are painted as wildcats armed with bottles of Botox, stiletto-stalking the kind of six-pack that doesn’t come in a can. What a sexist double standard.
Antebi prefers another term.
CLEO.
Defintion:
Just like Cleopatra, the magnificent Egyptian queen herself, these powerful women rule. Women have indeed come a long way and modern-day incarnations abound.
Cleos are not cougars on the prowl looking for sex with younger men. Cleos don’t have to prowl! Cleos are highly desired — at any age. Cleos don’t need a powerful man to boost their self-esteem. Cleos have their own power.
The whole cleo terminology is perhaps a reincarnation of the grrl power of the 1990s spouted by activists such as the Spice Girls. The definiton makes the “cleo” sound like a superwoman. As we all know, any worthy heroine has a foil.
Cue the…
WEED.
Defintion.
“Weed” (a woman who sleeps with other women’s husbands). A Weed will gladly spend the afternoon giving the royal treatment just so that during the middle of a siesta, she can slip out of bed and sneak into Cleo’s closet to try on her clothes and count her shoes. (Yes, she really will.)
While I like the re-appropriation of the word cougar, I’m not sure the whole cleo thing will catch on. I do find the creation of some terminology entertaining and slightly paranoid (*ahem* “weeds”–seriously?).
Meanwhile, I’ll stick to the mainstream view of the Cougar (see below) with a twist, of course. I think that the cougar phenomenon is largely conjured up because people think that once you get to a certain age you are not longer relevant and they are amazed that some women refuse to accept that. We need that image to make sense of the whole thing as a society. But the word in itself doesn’t actually make people pass judgment or feel a certain way about older women. I mean, there were already women who chased after young men long before the Cougar came along as a cultural staple as much as there were older women who did not need to chase after young men and were still the objects of desire. Perhaps, it’s not necessary to to recreate the etymological wheel to re-appropriate an image.
But then again, that’s just my opinion. I am, after all, highly entertained by the Cougar caricature.
How I Met Your Mother's Take On the Cougar (Image courtesy of TV Guide)
“Cougars” are still controversial and confusing, but perhaps some of the wisest of minstrels of female empowerment can help better explain them:
Yo I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
really really wanna zigazig ha.
Whatever that means…
